rhodeislandsheek.


Quotes that involve Phil K
05.22.2009, 2:34
Filed under: AMOR, Blogs In Class, Day In A Life, quotes | Tags: , , , ,

“apparently phill k likes to escalte things”

“yes i had sex with phill k”

“he touched my back”

“he touched my shoulder”

“Well he was all over me rubbing himself like a dead fish so ha!”

“he sexy cause hes my baby daddy”

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Quote’s From Kickass Poets

\QUOTES/

  1. “Fun Fact: Last halloween me and Phil K dressed up as pokemon, He was ash and i was pikachu” (Sarah kay)
  2. “Thats what we call FUCKING BRILLIANT” (Jason M)
  3. “The motherfucker poem is not done yet” (Thoma)


THE ARTS.
05.07.2009, 8:18
Filed under: Day In A Life, quotes, Rants., secrets., spazzing

“Creativity is an unknown language that everyone understands”
– NEW YORK TIMES STYLE MAGAZINE

And that is my magazine quote of the day.the future is a scary place.academics vs arts always been praised about my academics never the arts untill now I have “potential” if only they knew how much that word means to me living always envying those around me who in my eyes had such great talent but take it so for granted not knowing what to do with it “raw talent” wasted But now i am the one with Potential the one who has “raw talent”

what am i to do? will i waste mine as others before me?

or

will i pursue it unlike others before me

 



Quotes From Teachers.
04.06.2009, 4:43
Filed under: Blogs In Class, quotes, Rants., spazzing | Tags: , ,

Back to biology 😀

“Anne is the epitome of cool, leave her alone”
– Ms. Toro

“Twitter is stupid”
-Ms. Thoma

“I love korean pop stars, No actually I dont”
-Mr. Francis 😀



I WANNA BE A PRODUCER :D
01.31.2009, 7:21
Filed under: quotes, Rants., spazzing, the "in" thing

Leo Bloom: We might have a position for you.
Max Bialystock: As a matter of fact, we might have several positions for you.

——————————————————————————–
Leo Bloom: [sung] I wanna be a producer… ‘Cause it’s everything I’m not
Accountants: [sung] Unhappy… unhappy… So unhappy
Leo and Accountants: [sung] Very very very very very very very…
Accountants: [sung] Sad.
Leo Bloom: [sung] I wanna be a producer…
[spoken]
Leo Bloom: Hold everything! What I am I doing here? Mr. Bialystock was right! There is a lot more to me than there is to me! Stop the world, I wanna get on!
Mr. Marks: Bloom, where do you think you’re going? You’ve already had your toilet break.
Leo Bloom: I’m not going in the toilet… I’m going in SHOW BUSINESS! Mr. Marks, I’ve got news for you. I quit! And you’re right about one thing… You are a CPA – a Certified Public ASSHOLE! Here’s my visor… my Dixon Ticonderoga number two pencil… and my big finish!
Leo Bloom: [sung] I’m gonna be a producer Sound the horn and beat the drum I’m gonna be a producer Look out Broadway, here I come!
Chorus Girls and Accountants: [sung] Broadway, here he comes!

——————————————————————————–
Leo Bloom: I’m not going to the toilet, I’m going to showbiz!

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: There’s more to you than there is to you.
[Max turns away, silently mouthing “What the fu…”]

——————————————————————————–
Roger De Bris: Oh dear, your Mr. Bloom is staring at my gown. I should explain. I’m going to the choreographer’s ball this evening. There is a prize for best costume.
Carmen Ghia: We always win.
Roger De Bris: I’m not so sure about this year. I’m supposed to be the Grand Dutchess Anastasia, but I think I look more like the Chrysler Building!
Carmen Ghia: Well, as far as I’m concerned, without your wig on, you’re only half-dressed.
Roger De Bris: Well then, why don’t you go and get it, o Wicked Witch of the West?
[pause]
Carmen Ghia: If your intention was to shoot an arrow through my heart… bulls-eye!

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: We got the wrong play, the wrong director, the wrong cast. Where did we go right?

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: How did it begin? He walked into my office with his cockamamy scheme! You can make more money with a flop than with a hit! We can do it. We can do it. I can’t do it. We can do it. I can’t do it. Good-bye Max! Oh Lord I want that money! I’m back Max! Come on Leo we can do it! Step 1: Find the Play! See it, Smell it, Touch it, Kiss it! Hello Mr. Liebkind! Guten Tag, hop hop Guten Tag, clop clop! Adolf Elizabeth Hitler? Guten Tag, hop hop Guten Tag, clop clop! Step 2: Hire the Director Keep it gay, keep it gay, keep it Two-three, kick, turn, turn, turn, kick, turn! Ulla! Oooh wah weee wah wah wow wowie! Step 3: Raise the Money! Along Came Bialy! Step 4: Hire all the actors! A wandering minstrel I, A thing of shreds and… Next! The little wooden boy. Next! That’s our Hitler! Break a leg! I broke my leg! Springtime for Hitler and Germany- A surprise smash! Springtime for Hitler and Germany- It’ll run for years! Where did we go right? Where did we go right? Gimme those books Fat, fat, fatty! Gimme those books! Fat, fat, fatty! Books, fat! Books, fat! Books, fat! Books, fat! Lousy fruit- Kill the actors You ever eat with one? Then you ran to Rio And you’re safely out of reach, I’m behind these bars you’re banging Ulla on the beach! Just like Julius Caesar was betrayed by Brutus, Who’d think an accountant would turn out to be my Judas! I’m so dismayed, is this how I’m repaid? To be… Betrayed! BETRAYED!

——————————————————————————–
Franz Liebkind: You sniveling cowards. Cringing under a desk. Clinging on for life like baby butterflies. I am going to show you how to die like a man
[points gun to his own head and attempts to kill himself but is unsuccessful and then throws gun onto the couch and a bullet shoots out]

——————————————————————————–
Franz Liebkind: [sung] Guten Tag clap clap / Guten Tag slap slap.

——————————————————————————–
Leo Bloom: So what time can you get here?
Ulla: Well, Ulla wake up every morning at five AM. From five to seven, Ulla excercise. From seven to eight Ulla take long shower. From eight to nine Ulla eat big Swedish breakfast. Many different herrings. From nine to eleven, Ulla practice her singing und her dancing. And at eleven, Ulla like to have sex. So, what time should Ulla get here?
Leo Bloom, Max Bialystock: …Eleven.
Ulla: Good! Ulla will come at eleven!
Max Bialystock: [holding his head in his hands] Ulla will come at eleven…
Ulla: God dag min vannina!
Leo Bloom, Max Bialystock: God dag min vannina… ninna…
Ulla: God bless America!
[Ulla leaves]
Max Bialystock: God bless Sweden!

——————————————————————————–
Leo Bloom: Elizabeth?
Franz Liebkind: Ja. Not many people know this, but the fuhrer was descended from a long line of English queens.
Max Bialystock: [after a long pause] Is that right?

——————————————————————————–
Franz Liebkind: [making Max and Leo take the Siegfried Oath] All right. First you will raise your right forefingers, und repeat after me.
[they do]
Franz Liebkind: I solemnly svear…
Leo Bloom, Max Bialystock: [holding up their forefingers] I solemnly svear…
Franz Liebkind: To obey ze Zacred Siegfried Oas…
Leo Bloom, Max Bialystock: To obey ze Zacred Siegfried Oas…
Franz Liebkind: Und!
Max Bialystock: [switching to his Middle Finger] Und!
Leo Bloom: [switching to his Middle Finger] Und!
Franz Liebkind: [wagging his finger] Never, Never, Never!
Leo Bloom, Max Bialystock: [flipping Franz off] Never, Never, Never
Franz Liebkind: Dishoner ze spirit und ze memory of Adolph Elizabeth Hitler
Leo Bloom, Max Bialystock: Dishonor the spirit und ze… Elizabeth?
Franz Liebkind: Jah. Dat vas his middle name. Not many people know zis, but der F¸hrer vas descended from a long line of English qveens.
[long pause]
Max Bialystock: Is that right?
Leo Bloom, Max Bialystock: [shrugging] Adolph ELIZABETH Hitler.

——————————————————————————–
Franz Liebkind: [at end of credits] Don’t forget to buy “Mein Kampf” in paper back. Avaliable near you… at Borders Books… or Barnes and Noble… und Amazon.com

——————————————————————————–
[With one leg already broken Franz Liebkind falls down the stairs]
Officer O’Rourke: [Calling down the stairs] What happened?
Franz Liebkind: I broke… the other leg!

——————————————————————————–
[Max is recollecting his life while in a jail cell; he imgaines his momma calling him]
Max Bialystock: Wait a minute, my name’s not ‘Alvin’… Someone *else’s* life is flashing before my eyes. *What the hell is that about?* I’m not a hillybilly… I grew up in the Bronx. Leo’s taken everything… even my past!

——————————————————————————–
Leo Bloom: FAT!
Max Bialystock: I’m not that fat!
Leo Bloom: FAT! FAT!

——————————————————————————–
Leo Bloom: Max, I think we’re getting in too deep.
Max Bialystock: Too deep? This is nothing. I’ll tell you when we’re getting in too deep.

——————————————————————————–
Roger De Bris: Quick darling, back in the closet!

——————————————————————————–
Franz Liebkind: Stand still! How can I shoot you if you keep moving!

——————————————————————————–
Leo Bloom: Mr. Bialystock… I’M BACK!
Max Bialystock: [to God] You are good.

——————————————————————————–
Roger De Bris: This crazy Kraut is crackers! He crashed in here and crassly tried to kill us!
Carmen Ghia: Oh, Roger, what alliteration!
Roger De Bris: Thank you, darling.

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: Hold me touch me, where is hold me touch me…
[searches for picture]
Max Bialystock: Hold me touch me, Hold me touch me… Kiss me feel me, Yank me spank me, Suck me fu… ah! Hold me touch me!

——————————————————————————–
Brazilian Samba Performer: [Sung] You’ll find your happiness in Rio! The beaches there are strewn with pearls! The latin breezes always blow there! And so, we hear, do the girls!

——————————————————————————–
Donald Dinsmore: I would like to sing “The little wooden boy. ”
[the song intro plays as Donald dances. Just before he is about to open his mouth:]
Roger De Bris: NEXT!

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: [after seeing Franz perform at the auditions] THAT’S OUR HITLER!

——————————————————————————–
[as Max is sentenced for fraud]
Hold-Me Touch-Me: Hold me. Touch me.
Max Bialystock: I’m a little busy.

——————————————————————————–
Hold-Me Touch-Me: I made it out just like you told me to: To the title of the play. “Cash”. It’s a funny sort of name for a play, “Cash”…
Max Bialystock: So is “The Iceman Cometh”

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: When you got it baby flaunt it, flaunt it!

——————————————————————————–
Franz Liebkind: [at end of credits] Don”t forget to buy “Mein Kampf” in paper back. At Borders Books or Barnes and Knoble, or Amazon.com

——————————————————————————–
Leo Bloom: Today I have taken the Siegfried oath, and danced with a sailor, police man and very friendly Cherokee Indian

——————————————————————————–
Carmen Ghia: [Leo and Max have just left Franz, wearing swastika armbands and arrive at Roger’s penthouse, forgetting they’re wearing them. Carmen greets them at the door] May I take your hat, your coat, and your swastikas?

——————————————————————————–
Ulla: [sung] Violinists love to play an E-string, but audiences really love a G-string!

——————————————————————————–
Franz Liebkind: The Fuhrer wasn’t a mousy little mama’s boy! The Fuhrer was BUTCH!

——————————————————————————–
Leo Bloom: I want everything I’ve ever seen in the movies!

——————————————————————————–
Franz Liebkind: Hilda, where are you going? Argentina’s that way!

——————————————————————————–
Leo Bloom, Max Bialystock: We can do it! We can do it!
Max Bialystock: Every show I touch I doom!
Leo Bloom, Max Bialystock: We were fated, To be mated, We’re Bialystock and Bloom!

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: [with a very high Irish accent] And now I’ll be on me way, before me voice gets any higher! As we say in the old country…
[normal voice]
Max Bialystock: TAXI!

——————————————————————————–
Leo Bloom: I’m very sorry I caught you feeling up the old lady.
Max Bialystock: “Feeling up the old lady.” Thank you Mr. Tact.

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: Listen Roger, I know we sent it to you only this morning, but did you get a chance yet to read “Springtime for Hitler?”
Roger De Bris: Read it? I devoured it! And I find it remarkable, REMARKABLE! I feel it is a very important piece drenched with historical goodies. I for one, for instance, never realized that the Third Reich meant Germany.
Max Bialystock: Yeah, how ’bout that? Then you’ll do it?
Roger De Bris: Do it? Of course not. It’s not my kind of thing, I mean, Max please… World War II? Oooh… too dark, too depressing.
[Music starts]
Roger De Bris: [sung] The theatre’s so obsessed / With dramas so depressed / It’s hard to sell a ticket on Broadway / Shows should be more pretty / Shows should be more witty / Shows should be more…
[spoken]
Roger De Bris: What’s the word?
Leo Bloom: Gay?
Roger De Bris: Exactly!

——————————————————————————–
Carmen Ghia: And so the rule is, when mounting a… play. Keep it gay, keep it gay, keep it gay.

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: I’m drowning here! I’m going down for the last time! I… I… I see my whole life flashing before my eyes! I see a weathered old farmhouse… With a white picket fence… I’m running through fields of alfalfa with my collie, Rex. No Rex, not on the alfalfa. And I see my mother… I see Mama, standing on the back porch… And I hear her calling out to me…”Alvin, don’t forget your chores! The wood needs a-cordin’ and the cows need a-milkin’! Alviiiiin! Aaaaalviiiiiiiiiiiin!”… Wait a minute. My name’s not Alvin. That’s not my life. Someone else’s life is flashing before my eyes. What the hell is that about? I’m not a hillbilly, I grew up in the Bronx. Leo’s taken everything from me… Even my past!

——————————————————————————–
Ulla: [nervously] Okey-dokey… you like it?
Max Bialystock: Lik-, like it? I want you to know, my dear, that even though we are sitting down, we are giving you a *standing ovation*.
[Leo and Max both cross legs uncomfortably]

——————————————————————————–
Franz Liebkind: I was never a member of the Nazi Party! I only followed orders. I had nothing to do with the war! I didn’t even know there was a war on. We lived in the back, right across from Switzerland. All we heard was yodelling… yoodle le he hoo

——————————————————————————–
Ulla: My name is Ulla Inka Hanson Benson Yanson Tallen Hallen Swadon Swanson.
Max Bialystock: What is your first name?
Ulla: Oh that was my first name. Would you like to hear my last name?
Max Bialystock: We don’t have the time.

——————————————————————————–
Sing Sing Prison Guard: Gentlemen, you are hereby granted a full pardon for having – through song and dance – brought joy and laughter into the hearts of every murderer, rapist, and sex maniac in Sing Sing! You’re free!

——————————————————————————–
[Carmen answers the phone, a piano underscore playing]
Carmen Ghia: Hello, the living room of renowned theatrical director Roger De Bris’ elegant Upper East Side townhouse on a sunny Tuesday afternoon in June. Whom may I say is calling?
[Carmen frowns and the piano abruptly stops]
Carmen Ghia: Listen, you broken down old queen. He was drunk, he was hot, you got lucky! Don’t ever call here again!
[he slams the phone down]
Roger De Bris: Who was that?
Carmen Ghia: Wrong number!

——————————————————————————–
Judge: And who might you be, my dear?
Ulla: Ulla Inga Hansen Bensen Yonsen Tallen-Hallen Svaden-Svanson… Bloom.
Judge: You’re HIS wife?
Ulla: He wouldn’t do it unless we got married!
Judge: What a schmuck!

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: Settle down, you teutonic TWIT!

——————————————————————————–
Leo Bloom: [Going hysterical, and pointing at Bialystock] FAT!

——————————————————————————–
Franz Liebkind: Ze penalty for braking ze Siegfried Oath is DESS!
Max Bialystock: Dess? Is that anything like death?
Franz Liebkind: YETH!

——————————————————————————–
Hold Me-Touch Me: I know, let’s play the virgin milkmaid and the well-hung stable boy.
Max Bialystock: Oh, I don’t think I have the strength.
Hold Me-Touch Me: Don’t worry, I’ll be gentle.
[Hold me-Touch me grabs an umbrella and mimcks carrying milk]
Hold Me-Touch Me: Oh dear, this milk is so heavy. I’ll never reach the house. You there, well-hung stable boy, won’t you please help me?
Max Bialystock: Why of course my little dairy queen. First, I shall take your milk. Then, I shall take your VIRGINITY!

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: Whatta ya say, Bloom?
Leo Bloom: [sung] What do I say? / Finally a chance to be a broadway producer! / What do I say? / Finally a chance to make my dreams come true, sir! / What do I say? What do I say? / Here’s what I say to you, sir…
Leo Bloom: [sung] I can’t do it!

——————————————————————————–
Franz Liebkind: I must tell my birds!

——————————————————————————–
Stormtrooper “Mel” (voice): Don’t be stupid, be a smartie. Come and join the Nazi Party.

——————————————————————————–
Carmen Ghia: [answering the door at Roger’s house] Yessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss?
Max Bialystock: I…
Carmen Ghia: …sss!

——————————————————————————–
Franz Liebkind: That is not how you sing Haben Sie geh^rt das Deutsche band! This is how you sing Haben Sie geh^rt das Deutsche band!

——————————————————————————–
Franz Liebkind: Broadway! I haven’t been so happy since we crushed Poland!

——————————————————————————–
Roger De Bris: I am going to the choreographers’ ball this evening. There is a prize for best costume.
Carmen Ghia: We always win.
Roger De Bris: I am not so sure about this year. I am supposed to be the Grand Dutchess Anastasia, but I think I look more like the Chrysler Building.

——————————————————————————–
Franz Liebkind: This is no good. I’m not killing anybody.

——————————————————————————–
Mr. Marks: Do I smell the revolting stench of self-esteem?

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: We got the wrong play. We got the wrong director. We got the wrong actors. Where did we go right?

——————————————————————————–
Leo Bloom: Mr. Bialystock, I’m afraid you’ve mistaken me for someone with a spine.

——————————————————————————–
Franz Liebkind: [while waving a gun around] You made a fool of Hitler!
Carmen Ghia, Roger De Bris: [Carmen and Roger peer over the couch where they are hiding] He didn’t need our help.

——————————————————————————–
[repeated line]
Leo Bloom: Max, I think we’re getting in too deep.

——————————————————————————–
Franz Liebkind: You know, not many people know zis, but der F¸hrer was a terrific dancer.
Max Bialystock: Really? Gee, we didn’t know that, did we, Leo?
Leo Bloom: No, we sure didn’t.
Franz Liebkind: THAT’S BECAUSE YOU WERE TAKEN IN BY THE BBC! Filthy British lies! But did they ever say a bad word about Winston Churchill? CHURCHILL!
[gags]
Franz Liebkind: With his cigars, and his brandy, and his ROTTEN paintings! ROTTEN! Hitler, there was a painter! He could paint an entire apartment in one afternoon! Two coats!

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: [patting Franz comfortingly] There, there.
Franz Liebkind: Where? Where?

——————————————————————————–
Leo Bloom: Actors aren’t animals! They’re human beings!
Max Bialystock: Have you ever eaten with one?

——————————————————————————–
Roger De Bris: Of course that whole second act has to be rewritten. They’re losing the war? Excuse me? It’s too downbeat!

——————————————————————————–
Roger De Bris: [sung as Hitler] I was just a paper hanger / no one more obscurer. / Got a phone call from the Reichstag / told me I was F¸hrer. / Germany was blue / What, oh, what to do? / Hitched up my pants / and conquered France. / Now Deutschland’s smiling through!
Roger De Bris: [spoken] But it wasn’t always so easy… It was 1932. Hindenburg was working the Big Room and I… I was playing the lounge. And then I got my big break. Somebody burned down the Reichstag. And would you believe it? They made me Chancellor. Chancellor!
Roger De Bris: [sung] It ain’t no mystery / if it’s politics or history. / The thing you’ve got to know is / everything is showbiz!

——————————————————————————–
Roger De Bris, Carmen Ghia: [sung] A Happy Ending will pep up your play…
Roger De Bris: [sung] Oedipus won’t bomb…
Carmen Ghia: [sung] If he winds up with Mom! / Keep it gay…
Roger De Bris: [sung] Keep it gay…
Roger De Bris, Carmen Ghia: [sung] Keep it gay!

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: I’ll send you to the moon Thursday. I may even join you.

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: Shut up! I’m having a rhetorical conversation!

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: Do you know who I am?
Leo Bloom: You are Max Bialystock, King of BROADWAY!
Max Bialystock: No, I am Max Bialystock – that’s right!

——————————————————————————–
Leo Bloom: I’m wet! I’m hysterical and I’m wet!
Max Bialystock: [slaps him]
Leo Bloom: I’m in pain! I’m in pain, and I’m wet, and I’m still hysterical!

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: Dear Lord… I want that money!

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: [holding play] Smell it. Touch it. Kiss it. Kiss it! It’s the mother lode…

——————————————————————————–
Franz Liebkind: AQAP!
[beat]
Franz Liebkind: As quick as possible!

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: Franz Liebkind?
Franz Liebkind: I was not a member of the Nazi party!

——————————————————————————–
Franz Liebkind: Nein.
Max Bialystock: Nein?
Franz Liebkind: No.
Max Bialystock: That’s what nein means.

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: [about Franz’s hop-clop] It’s sort of a Nazi Hoedown.

——————————————————————————–
Carmen Ghia: He’s having a stroke!
Leo Bloom, Max Bialystock: What?
Carmen Ghia: Of Genius!

——————————————————————————–
Roger De Bris: I shall have to think about it – I’ll do it.

——————————————————————————–
Roger De Bris: [signing his name] Roger Elizabeth DeBris!

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: [after hearing Ulla’s huge name] What’s your first name?
Ulla: That was my first name. You wanna hear my last name?
Max Bialystock: Sorry. We don’t have time.

——————————————————————————–
Ulla: Would you like Ulla make audition?
Leo Bloom: That won’t be nece…
Max Bialystock: Yes, it is nece! Extremely nece!

——————————————————————————–
Ulla: Secretary-slash-receptionist? Okie-slash-dokie!

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: The two cardinal rules of producing. One: Never put your own money in the show.
Leo Bloom: And two?
Max Bialystock: [yelling] Never put your own money in the show!

——————————————————————————–
Ulla: So, Mr. Bloom. Ve are all alone.
Leo Bloom: Yes, ve are.

——————————————————————————–
Ulla: Why Bloom go so far camera right?

——————————————————————————–
Leo Bloom, Max Bialystock, Carmen Ghia, Roger De Bris: Break a leg!
[CRASH!]
Max Bialystock: Franz, what happened?
Franz Liebkind: I broke my leg!

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: Always moving your lips along with the actors.
Roger De Bris: [mouthing along with him] Always moving your lips along with the actors.

——————————————————————————–
Carmen Ghia: Roger, We’re not alone…

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: [to a prisoner in Sing Sing] What are you in for, lack of rhythm?

——————————————————————————–
Carmen Ghia: [At Hitler auditions] Jason Green.
Roger De Bris: Well Jason, what have you been up to lately?
Jason Green: For the last 16 years, I’ve been touring in “No, No Nietzsche.”
Roger De Bris: You played Nietzsche?
Jason Green: No, no.
Roger De Bris: What are you going to sing for us?
Jason Green: Have you ever heard the German band?
Roger De Bris: No.
Jason Green: That is the name of the song I am going to sing.
Roger De Bris: Oh.

——————————————————————————–
Roger De Bris: Oh and Max darling we LOVED Funny Boy, didn’t we Carmen?
Carmen Ghia: Oh WORSHIPPED it! Uh… To be or not to be…
Roger De Bris: You mean a lot to me!
Roger De Bris: Show stoppah!
Carmen Ghia: FABULOUS!
Max Bialystock: …Right.

——————————————————————————–
Roger De Bris: You mean that smell is you? Oh GOD. If I could bottle you, I’d shove you under my armpits every day.

——————————————————————————–
[preparing to perform “The Guten Tag Hop-Clop”]
Franz Liebkind: First, you must roll up your pants.
Max Bialystock: Okay.
[He and Leo begin to roll up their pant legs]
Franz Liebkind: Rolling?
Max Bialystock: Rolling.
Franz Liebkind: Rolling?
Max Bialystock: Rolling.
Franz Liebkind: Come on, don’t be stingy! Show some LEG!

——————————————————————————–
Leo Bloom: Ooh, Ohh how I hate you!
Max Bialystock: Double, DOUBLE!

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: Why you miserable, cowardly, wretched little caterpillar… *takes blue blanket*…
Leo Bloom: Ahhhhh!
Max Bialystock: Don’t you ever want to become a butterfly? Don’t you want to spread your wings, and flap your way to glory?…
Leo Bloom: …No!

——————————————————————————–
Ulla: Mr. Bloom! Leo!
[running towards Leo]
Ulla: Your tie is all askew!
Leo Bloom: Askew?
[Leo lovingly looks on as Ulla adjusts is bowtie]
Leo Bloom: Well, thank you, Ulla. Have a good show.
[Leo and Ulla immediately embrace and kiss one another]
Leo Bloom: [after releasing himself from Ulla’s kiss and embrace] Roll’em in the aisles.
Ulla: Okie-Dokie. I will try to. But there’s just so many of them.

——————————————————————————–
Leo Bloom: Mr. Marks, you were right about one thing. You are a CPA. A Certified Public ASS-HOLE!

——————————————————————————–
Carmen Ghia: [coming out of the closet] OCIFFERS!

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: Don’t you see Bloom? You’re like… you’re like a fountain!
Leo Bloom: I’m a fountain?
Max Bialystock: [yelling] YES YOU’RE A FOUNTAIN!

——————————————————————————–
Mr. Marks: WHAT? You’ve never seen someone humiliated before?

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: So, you’re an accountant?
Leo Bloom: Yes, sir, I am, sir.
Max Bialystock: Then account for yourself!

——————————————————————————–
Leo Bloom: Let’s assume for a moment, that you are a dishonest man.
Max Bialystock: Assume away.

——————————————————————————–
Carmen Ghia: If your intention was to shoot an arrow through my heart… Bull’s-eye!

——————————————————————————–
[an outtake]
Max Bialystock: You okay?
Leo Bloom: Oh, yes. Thank you for smiling, it really helped.
Max Bialystock: [walking over to a bust of Shakespeare] Well, you know what they say: “Smile and the world smiles with you!” Hahahaha-
[undertones to the bust]
Max Bialystock: This man should be in a straitjacket.
[pause]
Max Bialystock: What?
[pause]
Max Bialystock: Don’t argue with me, you piece of-!
[he slaps the bust angrily, and turns to Leo again, speaking calmly]
Max Bialystock: Feeling better?
Leo Bloom: [suppressing laughter] Yes.
Max Bialystock: Good. That makes three of us.

——————————————————————————–
[from deleted scene]
Max Bialystock: Did you bring the checkie?
Hold Me-Touch Me: Yes, but first, lets play one, dirty little game.
Max Bialystock: Here in broad daylight. All right what do you want to play?
Hold Me-Touch Me: Lets play the hairless chiwawa and the well hung Great Dane!

——————————————————————————–
Stormtrooper Rolf: I was born in Düsseldorf, and that is why they call me Rolf.

——————————————————————————–
Roger De Bris: Mrs. Bialystock and Bloom I pressume? Ha! Forgive the pun!
Leo Bloom: What pun?
Max Bialystock: Shut up! He thinks he’s witty!

——————————————————————————–
Ulla: Remember ven Ulla Dance?
Leo Bloom, Max Bialystock: Ja.
Ulla: Ulla dance again!
Max Bialystock: ULLA DANCE AGAIN!

——————————————————————————–
Roger De Bris: Carmen, call in a singing Hitler, please.
Carmen Ghia: Yes, darling- Roger.

——————————————————————————–
Hold Me-Touch Me: You know what I’d really like?
Max Bialystock: [turning to the hot dog vendor] She’ll have the foot long

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: Hey Kid. Hey. Yo-Hoo. Look at this.
[steps over Leo]
Max Bialystock: How can I help you?
Leo Bloom: [Screaming]
Max Bialystock: What’s wrong?
Leo Bloom: You’re gonna jump on me.
Max Bialystock: What?
Leo Bloom: You’re gonne jump on me.
Max Bialystock: No.
Leo Bloom: I know you’re gonna jump on me…
Max Bialystock: No. Calm down.
Leo Bloom: …And squash me like a bug.
Max Bialystock: Oh God.
Leo Bloom: Please don’t jump on me.
Max Bialystock: I’m not gonna jump on you. I’m not gonna jump on you.
Leo Bloom: [screams again]

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: [reading through scripts] Wait, here’s one: “One morning Gregor Samsa awoke to discover he had been transformed into a giant cockroach!”…
[pause]
Max Bialystock: Nah, too good.

——————————————————————————–
Ulla: [Ulla finds Leo hanging on the closet door] Leo, what happened? I know – you hung up your coat while you were still in it!

——————————————————————————–
Roger De Bris: And now finally, last and least, my lighting designer, Shirley Markowitz.

——————————————————————————–
Carmen Ghia: May I take your hats, your coats, and your Swastikas?
Max Bialystock: Oh, these?
[Max and Leo take off their Swastika armbands and hand them to Carmen]
Max Bialystock: [laughs nervously] We just came from this big rally. Everyone was wearing one!

——————————————————————————–
[Roger De Bris enters the room]
Leo Bloom: Max… He’s wearing a dress!
Max Bialystock: No kidding!

——————————————————————————–
[Max and Leo see Franz feeding his pigeons]
Max Bialystock: Just a hunch… but I’m guessing that’s our man.
Leo Bloom: Oh, Max! He’s wearing a German helmet. And leiderhosen!
Max Bialystock: I know, I know! Just don’t notice! Don’t notice anything!

——————————————————————————–
Max Bialystock: Franz Liebkind?
[Franz slams his back against the pigeon roost]
Franz Liebkind: [yells] I vaz never a member of the Nazi party! I had nossing to do vith the var! I didn’t even know there vas a var on! Vee lived in zee back… near Svitzerland! All vee ever heard vas yodeling!

——————————————————————————–
[Max and Leo have just left after agreeing to produce Franz’s play]
Franz Liebkind: Vatt nice guys! Oh… Broadvay! I haven’t been zis happy since vee crushed Poland!



Prelude
01.27.2009, 4:21
Filed under: AMOR, quotes
Finally i actually found something that
maybe just maybe could last for more than a second
it doesnt have to last for all of eternity
i just need it to last for as long as it can

For when it does die
i hope it ends with our friendship still in tact
it doesnt have to be as strong as it was
aslong as theres still a lil spark of it and it’ll be fine with me.
unlike those who came before.

I thought this too was once doom to fail
since i had so much evil intention
but now they seem to have faded away
i no longer have my cool facade 
which has always been my strongest weapon
never caring of what happens
and slides away with every evil doing
never being suspected it too.

it has been reduced to this small easily hurt being
which has never done an evil deed
but as easily as it got hurt
it also was easily filled with delight
pure innocent happiness

Who knew you could have such an impact
on someone once so strong and proud
but strip her of all that and find
that little child who was always there
just afraid of ever being seen and disliked

I should have never taken interest on you
Never to have made plans to get to know you
Never to have talked to you
Never to have seen you
Never let you open up to me
Never to have easily read you
&& To have never ever found out we were so alike in so many ways
Hardships,Feelings && even love

When I think of you
I see a bit of myself
Telling me not to harm your little pure heart
For it cannot take any more
And now ive seen your real heart
i had the oddest desire to fix it
even though not completely
just a few bits and pieces of it if i may
and when i do
there is a tiny spark of hope in my stone cold heart
that maybe just another maybe
it too could see a glimpse of the warm sunlight
it use to love so dearly
and by doing so it would also heal slowly
and go back to what it was once

I do not need any love to be returned
All i need a smile
and the 2 simple words
i think is the best way to show grattitude
‘Thank You’
and then we could go our seperate ways
only remembering things that were once were.
and yet walking away knowing that we could still grow without any regrets


Currently Listening to:
01.26.2009, 9:54
Filed under: musika, quotes
Constantly.
I knew it was there
Though I tried to hide it
But the feeling just kept on shining through
Haven’t known you that long
So I try to deny it
But the feeling was much too much too strongCould this be love
Deep down inside
Tearing me apart
I feel it in my heart

[Chorus:]
Constantly, you’re on my mind
Thinking ’bout you all the time
I can’t sleep no matter what I do
I just keep on thinking ’bout you

Why do I feel this way
When I know you have someone
That you’re seeing each and every day
Should I play this game
Of just being your friend
When I know that’s not where I want it to end

How could this be wrong
When the feeling’s so strong
Tearing me apart
I feel it in my heart

[Chorus:] [2x]
Constantly, you’re on my mind
Thinking ’bout you all the time
I can’t sleep no matter what I do
I just keep on thinking ’bout you

No I don’t want to start no trouble
Between you and I and your lover
But I must tell you what I’m going through
Everytime you walk by I see love in your eye

You’re on my mind
Keep thinkin’ about your love
I just keep on thinking ’bout you

[Chorus:]
Constantly, you’re on my mind
Thinking ’bout you all the time
I can’t sleep no matter what I do
I just keep on thinking ’bout you